Dear Father,
I just recently have found out that I am not to receive Holy Communion if I am using contraceptives. I do believe the teachings of the Catholic Church and am willing to follow their teaching; however, I am married to a non-Catholic. I have not told him that I am no longer receiving Holy Communion, because of our contraceptive practice. My question is: What if I explain to him the teachings of the Church and because he is not Catholic he will not agree to cease using contraception. Will I have to wait to receive the Eucharist when we no longer use contraception because of my age?
God Bless,
Ann
Ann,
It is good to see that you understand the Church's teaching regarding artificial contraception. Nevertheless, It is a sad statement about the state of Catholic formation in the Church today that you were not informed of this earlier. As regards to continued use of artificial contraception anytime that we are in a state of mortal sin we are not to receive Holy Communion until we repent of the practice and go to confession. Repent means that we recognize what we are doing as sinful and have the intention not to do it anymore. If one goes to confession yet does not have true repentance then that would not be a valid confession. However, even if we do have true repentance we may still lapse after that and in that case we can go to confession again and then are free to receive Holy Communion. However, while it is good that you are refraining from Holy Communion as long as you continue to contracept it must be remembered that it is still an immoral act and should not be engaged in regardless of the issue of Holy Communion. Even though your husband is not Catholic it is still morally wrong for him to use artificial contraception as well. The moral teachings of the Catholic Church are not restricted to Catholics. The Church bases her moral teachings on what is known as the natural law, that is one can tell how something is or is not morally acceptable based upon the workings of nature. In this case the practice of artificial contraception is at odds with the sexual act because it frustrates the normal purpose of the act. All persons can understand this based upon reason, logic and science. As Christians we have a fuller understanding of the morality of the sexual act due to the revelation of Jesus Christ and this helps us to better understand it yet this does not mean that others are unable to grasp this fundamental truth. As a human your husband should be able to see the design of nature in the purpose of fruitfulness in the sexual act. Though not a Catholic, if he is a Christian the revelation of Christ's love should inform him that the sexual act is an expression of totally committed love focused outward toward you and that when the possibility of life is removed the other partner becomes objectified and the sex act becomes inward focused for one's pleasure. I realize that this is a difficult issue to handle and a will keep you in my prayers.
Fr. Pisut
